In truth I wanted to put some distance between me and Granada before I updated.

I’m referring, in most part, to time passing and the ability to put my experiences in context.  Then again if people don’t like what I have written then the geographic distance is no bad thing either.

Relax, I’m not going to slag anybody off.  Well not much anyway.

So why didn’t it work?  Why, when I was so excited about going there did I not stay longer?

Well let’s blame me, or rather us, first.  I think we were a little jaded.  Developing world living can take it out of you.  We’d been in Vietnam for two and a half years previously.

Secondly we were both under-employed.  For whatever reasons our
volunteer posts just didn’t work.  They didn’t take as much of our time
as we had hoped – other bill-paying gigs we hoped to scare up simply
didn’t materialise.

You can add to this an absolute absence of social life.  We met some
nice people.  We hung out.  But not very often.  It seemed that most
expats were the older retired “Florida Overspill” brigade. 

People tried to tell us that actually there was a real social expat
scene.  But honestly I never saw more than a dozen people in an expat
hangout at one time. We frequently went for days without talking to anyone but each other.

And apologies, but while we’re talking about white faces in Nicaragua,
the whole missionary thing was new to me and a little unsettling.  I
wonder sometimes how my country would react to overseas visitors
selling their religion to us.  An ear-splittingly amplified US
evangelist in Leon town square felt frankly sinister.

I know that most missionaries offer more than just religious support so
I’ll leave it at that.  Suffice to say, I have never come across so
many Christians before.

Call me a bad influence but I missed people who drank too much, listened to loud music and swore more often. 

But what of Nicaragua?  Well, it is beautiful. Really beautiful.

As the rains came, and it became more green, it turned even more gorgeous
in front of our eyes.  If I can no longer personally recommend Nicaragua as
somewhere to live, I have no hesitation in telling you to take a holiday
there.  It is stunning.

And as for the locals… well I thought the
Vietnamese culture was  far removed from my own but in many ways
Nicaraguan culture was, to me, even more odd.

It’s easy to see the people, particularly the men, as lazy and maybe that is a criticism that
can vaguely be leveled.  But that is harsh.  Me, I prefer to see people as content.  People whose
parents had grown up with nothing seemed content to get by on very
little too.  Kids weren’t sent to school because their parent
themselves were barely literate and “they’d done okay”.

Certainly, while people worked hard to buy rice and beans.  They didn’t
appear likely to want to work harder still to lengthen that shopping
list.

I don’t want that to be seen as a criticism.  Nicarguans families spend
more time together than their developed country counterparts.  You
can’t put a price on that.

Nicaraguans, like Nicaragua, will continue to scrape by for the time
being.  But with neither having much in the way of cash in the bank –
heaven help them the next time a disaster hits – be it war or weather.

I guess that is what we work for in developed countries – wealth as a
buffer that will help us during the bad times.  Nicaragua has no such
luxury which makes you fear for its future all the more.

While we’re talking of future it seems impossible to talk of Nicaragua
without talking of the Sandinistas.  You can hardly fail to have
noticed that I have sympathies for them.

Do I think they will enjoy political success and make great strides for Nicaragua?  Well no, I don’t. 

Let me put that in context.  I don’t think any government could.  Not
with what they have to work with.  In addition, there are too many
powerful people and individuals who will conspire against them.  There
will also be corruption.  It seems corruption comes with all
governments.

Do I think anybody else can do any better.  I don’t know. I don’t think
so.  But the barely functioning Nicaragua I saw was, for the most part,
what US-pleasing, neo-liberal governments produced. 

So, I guess I should sum up Nicaragua and my experiences.

In a strange way I miss it already.  I miss its simple pleasures.  It’s down to earth people.  It’s fresh air and space.

I feel a little embarrassed that, having moved there, I failed to make it work.  In that sense I feel that one day I have a duty to return.

Most of all I hope that will not be because Nicaragua is struck by
disaster.  I hope its future is less bleak than its past.  If I do go
back, I hope it is to enjoy the country and play a part in its future
development – not to help clean up after a tragedy – be it an act of
God or man.

So, if you’ve never been, go.  Go to Nicaragua.  Enjoy it all.  If
you’re holidaying then you’ll have more than enough to see and do in
your couple of weeks.  If you plan to stay there then make sure,
before you take the plunge, that you’ll have enough to occupy your time.

We didn’t.  We left.

But I will never forget Nicaragua.  It is a place that gets its hooks into you. 

I’m glad, even if it was only for a while, that I was Our Man in Granada.

* Don’t give up on this site just yet.  I’ve been putting together a
short film of our time in Granada which should be appear soon.  In the
meantime I have already made the switch home.  Our Man in Newcastle is
up and running.

 Then again sometimes you just have to stick the boot in…

Can I just say that Lazy Bones Hostel in Leon was woeful.  At $25 for a room which had the only
the redeeming quality of a private bathroom, with coldwater shower, it was overpriced.   At breakfast (which was, of course, extra) the next day, they replaced tortillas with dry, un buttered cheap sliced bread. 

When we complained they said they had runout. Because, of course, there is a shortage of tortillas in Nicaragua.

Honestly, in any street in Nicaragua even I could find them in 20 seconds.

The coffee was undrinkable, they’d run out of juice, the eggs were salted to within an inch of their lives and the cheese was stale, unfried and prepared, only in the sense that it was sliced (brown rind
included) straight onto my plate.

Later I offered to pay for one of our breakfasts but I was buggered if I was paying for both. To her great credit the fabulous receptionist sympathised but explained she had to call the manager.  The gringo queso grande arrived and then left us hanging as he chatted instead to buddies he met on his way over.

The receptionist was mortified and made “I feel your pain” eyes at us.  Ten minutes later we thought
sod this, plonked down what we owed, minus the breakfast and walked out. The receptionist apologised again. The manager didn’t even notice us go.

I honestly wouldn’t have written this if he had been bothered to hear our gripe.  But seeing as he was so incredibly rude I thought I would instead write this and send it to him.

By contrast we visited fellow Leon Hostel, Big Foot. It wasn’t hard to see why it was so full while Lazy Bones was empty.  It was far cheaper too and so much more friendly. The food was great, the mojitos were fabulous and at the atmopshere was buzzing.

Their volcano surfing trip was incredible. See our pics here.

In the end though we thought we’d go a little upscale.  For $35, ie a mere $5 extra per per person, compared to Lazy Bones prices, we stayed in the Hotel Real – for that we got an edible breakfast, cable tv, air con and hot water showers.  We also got another great receptionist who couldn’t do enough to make our stay pleasurable

Kudos to the Real Hotel, and to Big Foot. As far as Lazybones goes…. well, they live up to their name if nothing else. Utter crap.

While the current Sandinista government may split locals and expats alike it’s worth remembering that the revolution was, at the time, almost universally backed.

Whether you blame what went wrong on Daniel Ortega or Ronald Reagan is down to you.

Join Empowerment International for an evening of Fundraising at Eurocafe for a Casino Night. 

 

All proceeds will go to EI’s Nicaragua project. 

 

By participating you will be assisting EI with accomplishing it’s mission of
breaking the cycle of poverty before it is transferred to yet another
generation, by building more educated and productive communities

 

When: Saturday July 21st

Time: 6:30 PM

Where:Eurocafe

Cost: C$200

For the uninitiated that’s Eurocafe, next to Hotel Colonial, in the Central Park area of Granada.

Look out for Nicaragua and the Contras amongst all those Pirates and Emperors.  It’s an absolute must watch.

Now this stuff is good.

I was never much of a spirits drinker before but Nicaragua’s Flora De Cana is universally loved by locals and gringos alike.

I’ve yet to meet anyone who doesn’t smack their lips at the very mention of the stuff.

I’ve tried it numerous way.  Personally it works best for me with a splash of soda and a twist of lime but it’s good with ginger ale too.  It’s just so smooth – even neat it slips down without the slightest twinge.

This particular bottle is for Vladimir whose had the thankless task of attempting to teach us Spanish.  Ourwoman’s good progress is testimony to his teaching ability, my slow progress is testimony to my linguistic failings.

So why are we giving him presents?

Well the lessons come to an end tomorrow as we prepare to head off. 

Yes, we’re cutting our Nica adventure short.

More info soon.

Side note: If anyone is looking for a translator/guide/Spanish teacher then I can’t praise Vladimir highly enough.  If you want his email address then drop me a line.

"Managua, Jul 5 (Prensa Latina) Nicaraguan
Police and Army denied their responsibility for a cargo of weapons made
in Israel, seized in Spain’s Port Algeciras, with the Central American
nation as final destination."

As buzzing internet conversations have already deduced – if Israel is sending weapons then obviously they won’t be for Danny and the Sandinistas.

Israel is too close to America and as others have noted, aren’t averse to doing a little dirty work on behalf of Uncle Sam.

Could this really be a case of enemies arming anti-Sandinista forces?

On World War 4 Report they wonder:

"Could they have been bound for some kind of neo-contra force? Talk about nostalgia for the ’80s…"

Guerrilla News Network is clearer still and fills in a little background:

"During the 1980s, Israel was a crucial conduit for the supply of arms
to Central American contra forces, as well as to apartheid South Africa
and Iran. With a Sandinista government installed in Nicaragua, and the
ever present irritant that is Hugo Chavez, could this discovery be a
sign of a new counter-revolutionary war?"

It worries me and it’s boosted my conspiracy paranoia.  If that is what it is doing to me, then can you imagine what is going on in Ortega’s head?

In the comments section, from the above page you can also read:

"The shipment may have been meant to be discovered as a psyop against
Commandante Daniel, to help push him to become repressive against his
political opponents. If you read Spanish, you should look at the
popular El Nuevo Diario (END)newspaper out of
Managua: You should see the tremendously ugly hateful spleen launched
there against Ortega on a practically daily basis, from the commentors
on the different news articles. The hatred expressed is hardly equaled
even in the free USA in alternative media
commentaries and blogs about W. Daniel has got to be getting a bit
wrankled by it all and arms headed for Nicaragua from Israel, making
the world news, would add to it."

Isn’t that how it works now?  Back your enemy into a corner.  Scare him and when he comes out fighting, point the finger and tell the world he’s a madman who needs to be brought to heel.

One thing that has been bothering me for a while.  Living in Nicaragua I am putting up with the almost daily electricity cuts.  As I understand it, Ortega inherited the problem from his predecessor.  Ever since his election we have repeatedly read of his attempts to solve the problem.

Even if this man was as useless as his detractors claim him to be, surely we would have seen some improvement?

So why is it only getting worse?

GNN publishes what I was just starting to think:

"This may put into a new light the power crisis which is hitting Nicaraguans.

“The crisis, worsened since mid-2006, stems from the poor condition of
thermal plants, mostly in private hands, and obvious problems of
distribution, in charge of Spanish multinational Union Fenosa.”
Sabotage is a distinct possibility."

Do I think we are on the verge of Contra War 2.  No I don’t.  I think the world has changed and the last thing Bush needs is another war.  But…

You import guns.  Even if the guns are for criminals rather than anti-government forces then it causes turbulence.  You interrupt the electricity flow.  In the Confessions of an Economic Hit Man, they talk of destabilising the country by sending in the CIA jackals.

Then when crime is up, power and water cuts are frequent and the embattled leader is paranoid and defensive – you just let the media and the electorate do the rest.

Sidenote: One of my favourite books of all time is A Very British Coup, it tells of a hard left Socialist becoming British Prime Minister and his attempts to stay in power as the CIA conspire to undermine him.  What is the first thing they do?  They get at the power workers Union which strikes and out go the lights.

And that is exactly what I think of every time it’s my lights that go.

In a headline regarding this country’s ripeness for investment it trumpets:

"Nicaragua No Longer Land of Sandinistas and Somozas but a Real Estate Opportunity"

I guess they haven’t bothered to research who the current government are.

Strangely, this scene came to my mind this morning as I was attacked by a dozen mosquitoes while sat on the toilet.

I feel your pain Kong.

This was sent out to us from the Nica PC security director. Always watching out for us!!………………….

"July
month of Sandinistas partying, during this month in every Nicaraguan
department a celebration takes place, in reminiscence of their
liberation.

"These activities start on July 15th and
finishes on the 19th day of the Sandinista Revolution, where the most
important gathering takes place in Managua, on this day or the day
before caravans of vehicles rally from all over the country.

"Be
advised that this year celebrations will NOT be as in early years (al
suave), with Sandinistas running the government, they will sure become
more expressives.

"PCVs or Trainees are not allowed to go near, participate in parties or gatherings related to these celebrations."